I see patterns. The natural world is built on patterns. Did you know that there are sixteen separate types of snowflakes? We're told right from the beginning that every snowflake is different, and it is. But there are names for the groups of shapes that occur according to the weather. Are you ready for this? Simple prisms, stellar plates, sectored plates, stellar dendrites, fernlike stellar dendrites, hollow columns, needles, capped columns, double plates, split plates and stars, triangular crystals, 12 sided snowflakes, bullet rosettes, radiating dendrites, rimed crystals, irregular crystals. Whew! And within those types every single flake is measurably different.
A few years back the Parelli Natural Horsemanship Organization put a learning system out titled, "PATTERNS". I bought it because I understood the idea. It was obvious to me that horses and dogs learn in patterns. Parelli has given the number of four to seven times for a new activity, for your horse to understand and retain it. That doesn't mean your horse responds perfectly in seven days, but it does mean that they know what you're requesting. It's up to the human to be good, better, best. Your horse has it down and will play with you at the level you're at. As you learn more about your timing, how to have light hands, how to be playful and relaxed and how to be provocative without being antagonistic your interactions together go to a higher level and, if you're lucky and specific, you sometimes attain that five minutes of elegance and perfection that makes your heart sing People learn in patterns too. Some of those behaviors are set in place very early on by our parents, grandparents or guardians. If you are loved unconditionally, comforted when frightened or hurt, encouraged and supported and grow up knowing that you, just as you are, can accomplish the goals you are willing to work for and you're given the attention you need to help you reach those lofty ideas, with honest praise, you will grow up to be a person that gives those same behaviors to your children as they grow. It's a cycle.
I'm an artist by profession, a trained observer. And one of the things I see over and over are the patterns in the world. They fascinate me! And it's the same with the people around me. I see them repeating behaviors when, I'm fairly sure, they have no idea the circle they're in is one they've been in for years. I do that too. If my behaviors have changed it's because I set out to make myself react differently so I would not pass on the patterns of behavior I thought were wrong, inappropriate, hurtful and abusive to my children. I made it a goal to give them a foundation more stable than mine was.
But I still, sometimes, find myself falling back in to a set of interactions, with the people around me, unconsciously. And one of the things I do is allow people to take advantage of me because I love to please. I truly like people. I enjoy all of the messy, smelly, funny, clumsy, angry, anxious, farty, humanity of it. The down side is that I am not doing a good job of protecting my personal time and space. I put myself in a place where I am disappointed over and over. I always say, " No worries. " when someone cancels out an appointment although I've changed my day around to suit them, done my research to get us where we're going and set my plans to the side to help.
It's a Zen kind of thing for me. I love to help. I believe in the concept of paying it forward. It has to be true generosity given without expectations to be effective. Finding that balance is a challenge all on it's own. I do not want to patronize. I don't like it when people do that to me. I hold a hand out and say, " May I help you?" And if they say," No thank you, I've got it.", I always smile and say , "OK. " And I assume they really do want to figure it out on their own.
The other half of that coin of yin and yang is understanding when I'm being taken advantage of and treated with a lack of respect. After all these years with horses, you'd think I'd have that one down, wouldn't you? How interesting. When I am not focused while around my horses, they recognize that. And one of them, usually Apache (my LBE) will try shoulder checking me . Or they will barge in to my space, usually Lucky (my LBI and alpha of the herd). He will step on a rope or pull something out of my pocket. And it makes me laugh because they are much better teachers than I am. There's a pattern of behavior I've noticed in the people around me that, over the years, has happened repeatedly. They call and ask for help, usually with their horse or dog, their garden or some design they're working on. Would I be available tomorrow to help.( And it's nearly always tomorrow! How interesting.) And I say yes, glad to help. I rearrange my day to be there, setting time in my studio or out in the field painting, drawing or working with my horses (remember, I said I'm an artist by profession. I am, literally, setting aside the job that I have to help people with their hobbies.) to be there for them. And then they cancel the next day. I've lost track of the number of times that's happened. I can tell you that doesn't surprise me anymore. And my reply is always, " No worries. " And, again, I am disappointed.
I tell myself that I don't want them to feel pressure. But what I'm really doing is NOT setting myself or them up for success, especially if the time spent together was to help with their communication skills with their horse(s). I love being an ambassador for a system I truly believe in. I'm here because I want them to be safe.I truly want people to come away from our time together feeling successful and enjoying it so much they want to try it again.
This morning I asked my husband, John, for help to change my response. I can't change what other people do. That's their rodeo. I can decide how I want to behave. Yet another person canceled on an appointment they initiated yesterday. And, again, I was disappointed. But that's a fruitless kind of anger. There's nothing gained by allowing it to control me. I needed help. I asked John to be my simulated partner so I could practice different approaches.
John became the other person while I figured out how I wanted to address the next person that does this. And then I traded rolls with him. We went back and forth while we did early morning chores, until I had it worked out. While we did this I realized we've been here before. This is a pattern of behavior that has happened over and over in my life because I ALLOWED IT. I did not set my ground rules or have my responses worked out ahead of time. I think it's even a possibility I've attracted people like that in to my life. I seek it out because it was part of the pattern set in my childhood. That comes forward all of these years later to a set of expected interactions of me bending over until it hurts, to help others. They (and it happens with a majority of my friends too...how interesting!) expect me to be there for them. And I not only allow it, I encourage it. I am not following my own advice. e.g.. Set your personal boundaries and, politely but firmly, teach your horse where that space is. Nancy, note to self : SET your boundaries. PROTECT your personal schedule and space. SHOW MYSELF RESPECT by being politely persistent with others and myself. VALUE my work as an artist and horseman and never put it off to please another. The balance to that is to be there in an emergency. If someone or their horse is injured or sick, drop what I'm doing IF I CAN, and be there to help. See the IF I CAN? I need to remember that I sometimes CAN'T.
There is no doubt the same thing will happen again. And now I have a set of skills set in place to change how I react. I am changing my pattern . And now I'm out the door to work/play. Life is good! I am, ever yours, Nancy, smiling and shaking my head at the way things go ( and still thinking about the sixteen types of snow flakes. Who knew?!)
Did you know that I'm an artist? I am. Over the years I've designed furniture, made floorcloths, designed and painted murals, worked on gallery paintings, prints, drawings, been an illustrator. I was an excellent interior designer too. I ran a gallery that would have made it except for the events of 911. At some point I lost track of that. I focused on being a 'someone' that people expected me to be. I tried to live up to the expectations of others. And that's a goal that can not be reached because you can never be who you aren't. It's a chasm of disappointment. When I failed big time at being a mortar and brick business person I thought it was my fault. I was mortified. I lost my home, lost my business and nearly lost my family. I don't do failure well.
It wasn't my fault. Sometimes there are events you can not control. I simply was not on the path meant for me. Notice I didn't say wrong path. There are no wrong paths. But there are times in my life when I fell away from what I really was for the sake of other's expectations. I stood up, dusted myself off and began this second journey with the idea of fixing a part of myself that was not broken. I didn't know that. It's taken fifteen years for me to stop banging in to walls to understand that I am fine just the way I am. Good things did come from my remade self. I've learned how to do a fair to middling job of using technology. Scary territory. A paint brush and canvas, markers and paper or pastels and the ground I've made for them make more sense to me. Computers, pads and iPhones are science fiction. They beep and blink and feel odd under my hands. Even teaching myself to touch type was a struggle. And I've honed my story telling skills, rediscovered the joys of writing letters and essays. Sometimes I publish without editing and make grammatical mistakes that would make my honors professors roll over in their collective graves. Then again I like the raw, unfiltered original drafts too. I like the stumbling around and weird side bars that happen when my mind drifts. That's the right brained self popping out. I haven't killed her with my overwhelming need to fix what never needed to be repaired.
I've made friends, virtually, with people from all over the world. I Twitter, use Facebook, post on Pinterest and Instagram. I explore new apps and programs that show up every other week. And I observe. My Mom would understand that part of me, the person who keeps a running tab on how people react to what I have to say. And, slowly, the artist has come out from hiding. I let the ever loving crap beat me up and kept right on giving and giving and giving. I rediscovered the athlete who loves to run with horses and pull weeds until my hands bleed. I go to my 'Zen' place when I clean the barn until I'm parched, filthy and still driven to get the cobwebs down from that last corner. And here I am again, wandering. And wondering.
This year I've been writing and posting about politics. That's a subject I usually stay away from, along with religion. Most people are already set in their path. I've always thought it was a waste of energy for me to make any statements. But, considering the horrible mess American politics has become, I decided to adhere to the idea that bad things happen when good people are silent. I have always been a person in the middle. I follow no particular religion although I am spiritual. I am an independent voter who sometimes casts my vote for a Democrat, sometimes for a Republican and, more often, for an Independent candidate. (And I've been told that "my vote is a waste". No vote is ever a waste. This is supposed to be a democracy. People can vote for whomever they want to. My vote always counts and so does yours! ) I belong to only one organization because they have the best learning system I've found for teaching myself how to be safe with my horses. And I observe, watch, listen, and stir the pot to see how people will react. I read articles about the same event written for different organizations from opposite sides of the bar while I try to find out the truth, unfiltered and unbiased. Not easy to do in a virtual world where everything is an editorial.
I've come to the not too startling conclusion that life is just like high school. People still want me to be in one clique or another. I've been told, "Nancy, you're better than that." How patronizing. I do not need to be corrected or taught by anyone. I refuse to be categorized. I've been pushed around for my independence by trolls on the internet. And I think it's funny! I could be "helping" someone. I should be "smarter" than that (guess my IQ of 139 doesn't count, or my straight A's or high EQ, the two businesses I've run, and the more than 130 artists I sold work for. Did you know that I was selling more than 260,000 dollars in product a year, more than sixty percent of it fine art? No? Well now you do. And I went on to work as an independent seller for three different galleries while I helped to place some of those artists in other galleries because, for me, running a gallery was a promise that needed to be followed through on. Commitment is my middle name. And I also sold another 124,000 in fine art while I helped to place people. That means I made 112,000 for the artists and expenses only for me. Foolish? Perhaps. But it was my religion for a while. Making money was not the goal.) . I "should be doing more" with my life. I've been told "Glad to see you're doing something with your life". The list goes on and on. I've even been attacked for having raised sons who are strong, independent thinkers and creative problem solvers who don't always agree with me. How odd. Why would anyone think that children should be raised to be adult worker bees who follow my path? "You're not a very good mother." Yeah. I was told that too. I kind of think that's up to my adult children to decide, not some smug, patronizing goof ball who knows nothing about me or my family.
Shall I tell you what all of those statements mean to me? Nada. Zero. Zilch. So why did I bring them up? I've dropped hot potatoes for a year now to see how people react. I post highly reactive, controversial quotes, images and articles from the left and the right as a social experiment. I even told people I was doing that and the emotional reactions still happened. I. Am. Fascinated. And I am deeply saddened too. Most people never evolve past their high school expectations. No wonder the more things change, the more they stay the same. The Great Machine has done it's job. It seems that most people, even the well educated, are incapable of exploring the world outside of their own narrow ideal. We've been taught to do that by our education system right up through college, the media and the ever present peer pressure that I allowed myself to be led by. Shame on me. Sometimes my learning curve is huge and cumbersome. I am content. I love myself as the Independent that I am. I fit no one's ideals except my own. I do not need to be "better" or "worse", "smarter" or "more compassionate". I like the path I am on and I am fiercely proud of the people I love. I am Miss Nancy. I smile a lot. In fact I laugh more often than not. I am wounded and have ugly scars. I cry. I empathize without filters. I deeply believe in the power of fine art, the written word, music and the independent creative mind.
And I am off to spend my day being more of who I am and less of who the world thinks I should be. I am, ever yours just exactly the way I want to be, Miss Nancy, smiling because I can.
Do you remember a few posts back, where I wrote out ideas for changing your diet, dumping sugar, improving your health from the inside out? I decided to take my own advice. I wrote those posts for a friend who is seriously ill. She asked me for help. When I talked to her about her diet I hit a hot button. She had a melt down and I was the target for her anger. That was fear. And it was an honest answer too. You are what you eat. If you have a crappy diet you will, sooner or later, get sick. So, I decided to have my say here where anyone could read it without being offended. Nothing I suggested was radical. Take the sugar out of your diet. Make your own meals. Eat your vegetables and fruits. Exercise, breath and meditate, and do your best to get a good night's sleep. Pretty simple ideas but it turns out that talking to people about diet, even when they ask for help, is tricky stuff. But I hadn't really taken my own advice. It isn't fair for me to make suggestions to other people without going through the same process. I went through the kitchen, storage room downstairs, refrigerator and threw out all of the prepared foods and sugar. The only thing I use sugar for now is making kombucha. (Kombucha is a fermented tea. The sugar feeds the bacteria. It's a bit like making vinegar or beer.) And I started making smoothies for my husband and me for dinner every night. We've been doing that since June first. I didn't do it to loose weight. It was an experiment . We do a lot in the evenings in the Summer time so dinner ends up being late, usually after 8PM. Even a light meal has a tendency to sit heavy and it takes up a lot of time I would rather be spending outside working with horses or in the garden, taking photos in that gorgeous evening light or painting. Smoothies made life easier for us. No cooking. All I had to clean up was a blender and two glasses. Easy!
Turns out there were other benefits too. We both started sleeping better. Aches and pains stopped. No more tossing and turning. And, SHAZAAMM! We both lost weight. I'm down 12 pounds and still going. John lost even more but we won't talk about that. Men always loose weight more easily. That little 'Grandma Belly' that I had worked so hard to get rid of, the one my Doc said I probably wouldn't be able to loose because of metabolism changes as women age, is almost gone! I kid you not. I went shopping for new jeans and I was able to try on a size 8. I've been a size 12 for several years now, 10 if the jeans were made loose (which is mostly never). SIZE 8!!! I honestly tried on my first pair of skinny jeans. I didn't buy them. They were too expensive and I was looking for work jeans, something to muck out stalls and paint in. But I'm pretty sure they heard my "WHOOT WHOOT!" outside the store on the sidewalk. I put on skinny jeans and looked good in them too. I honestly did not start using smoothies as dinner to loose weight. I was just trying to take my own advice. It wasn't that much of a change for me, I have to admit. I keep raw honey or 100% organic maple syrup in the house if I need to add sweetness to something. And we've been vegetarians for years and love to eat here. We're both introverts so we like living quietly. Going out is a huge indulgence for us. It's easier to control your finances if you fix your own meals.
(You're wondering about the pictures of Apple. She's pretty. Can't help it if I like to post pictures of her. And I don't have to get a model's release to do it either.) I thought maybe you'd like some information on how I make the smoothies. They were a big money saver for us too, by the way. We've been using most of the vegetables and berries from our own gardens. You can buy all of this stuff at the grocery store though, so no big deal. In fact I suggest Costco. They have a lot of selections in the their fresh produce sections of vegetables and fruits that are organic and very tasty. Here's a list of some of the fruits I use. I try to use at least three in any combination in each smoothie. Keeps the colors, textures and flavors interesting. Ready? Here goes. : raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, apples, bananas, fresh pineapple, pears, red grapes, green grapes. I never peel any of the fruits i.e.. apples, pears. I do peel the bananas. I sometimes try more exotic fruits but those are the basics. For two people you'll want to (for example) use one banana, 1/2 to 1 cup raspberries, 1/2 to 1 cup red grapes. Sometimes I throw in a fourth fruit, so try adding 1/2 cup fresh pineapple chunks. And here's a list of the vegetables I've been using. : any type of greens i.e.. lettuce mixes, spinach, kale, chard, beet greens, carrot greens, sugar snap peas, tomatoes, cucumber, zucchini, summer squash, carrots. You get the idea. Almost anything goes. I try to use three or four vegetables . (This is for two people, by the way. Fills your blender to the top so you'll each get a good 12 ounces or more. Use a big glass. ) So I might add a cucumber, chopped in large pieces, a carrot and the greens, scrubbed but not peeled and chopped in large pieces, a couple of different kinds of lettuce (a cup or two), and maybe some celery greens. Celery was my 'outside the comfort zone' vegetable this year. Turns out it's really easy to grow your own and if you cut it about tow inches or more from the ground, it regrows. Easy peasy! I add 1/2 ounce of Organic Wheat Grass powder (which is one scoop. Comes in the container.) from a company called Amazing Grass. It's organic, vegan, gluten free and raw. Your body is going to love you for adding this to your smoothie! Packs a punch, nutrition wise. Then I add 1 ounce of Raw Protein and Greens from a company called Garden of Life. It comes in different flavors. I like the vanilla but you can also get plain or cocoa. (I just add a spoonful of cocoa or cocoa nibs if I want a chocolate flavor.) It's slightly sweetened with stevia, is organic and is also raw, vegan, gluten free, dairy free, soy free. An ounce is the size of the scoop that comes in the container. You can also buy it in packs to try the flavors out before you invest in the full size container. Pretty cool! There are other protein powders available too. You can find them on line or in your grocery store or coop. The one listed above contains six veggies and 20 grams of protein in one serving.
You can also add things such as a tablespoon of ground whole flax seed or chia seeds, peanut butter or peanut powder (just found that as Costco) for some added oom pa pa if you want something a bit thicker in your glass. Might want to choose just one though. Keep it simple. I sometimes add one or two drops of peppermint essential oil or orange or lemon oil, rosemary oil or clove bud oil. But keep it to just a couple of drops of one flavor/oil. Now for liquids. You'll want the equivalent of 1 and 1/2 to 2 cups of liquid. I usually combine two. I really like soy milk or almond milk, about 3/4 to 1 cup and 3/4 to 1 cup of either Knudsens Lemon Ginger Echinacea, or Mega Antioxidant or Green Mega (think that's the name). Sometimes I add some yogurt or kombucha and half the soy milk or kombucha and half the juice. Experiment with your favorites. Word to the wise ; don't use anything that has any sugar or fructose added to it. Stick to the real deal. You can also add some coconut water or milk. Just substitute for the juice or soy milk, about 1/2 cup. Blend away. I blend it at least twice, the equivalent of a couple of minutes. I really like to whip it up. My blender is old though so yours may be more efficient. You'll have enough for two people so half proportions for yourself if you are making it for one. I promise you it will fill you up. I am never hungry in the evenings.
You're probably wondering if I changed my diet in any other way. Nope. I eat my usual breakfast i.e.. egg and a piece of whole grain toast or muffin, a tomato and maybe some grapes OR yogurt and fruit and nuts, sweetened with honey or maple syrup, oatmeal and fruit and nuts. For lunch I have stir fry or rice and veggies or soup with a dollop of yogurt on top, something like that, (or salad. I love salads!) and for snacks I have an apple and peanut butter or a handful of nuts and cranberries or raisons. I drink a lot of tea, green or black and herb during the day as well as filtered water. And if my sweet tooth starts knocking at the door I have a couple of squares of Green and Black's dark chocolate. I love chocolate. Made a decision I just can't give that one up. Sometimes, if I'm in town, I will go to one of the really good ice-cream places and have a scoop of ice-cream. It's awesome when you haven't had anything sweet for a month, almost like an orgasm of taste. So satisfying. (she said with a wicked bad grin!) Eating like this is a life choice. I learned a lot about how to eat when I lived in Europe for a couple of years on a slim budget. There were fresh fruit and veggie markets, the best cheese I've ever had in my life and fresh egg stores almost anywhere. It's our American diet that's the culprit. If you can get away from the junk food, you're on the right path. Try the smoothies in the evening to start with, make the other changes as you go along. Then come back here and let me know how it worked. I want to hear your " WHOOT WHOOT!" stories too. I love you guys. I'm so glad you stop off to visit ever so often. I promise, the next posts will be more funny stories. Until then, I am ever yours, Nancy, smiling at you BIG TIME! (And standing in front of the mirror one more time to gaze at my considerably skinnier butt!) PS. Maybe I need to go get my hair styled now, just in case I decide to go back for those ridiculously expensive skinny jeans.
How we love our dogs. This isn't a new phenomena that came along with the internet and movies, endless videos on youtube or social media sites. We've loved our dogs for millennia before anyone had to confirm it for us. They sleep with us as babies and children, keeping us safe and warm. And as adults they love us for exactly who we are. They could care less whether we have a zit on the end of our nose or we're overweight, lonely or slow with age. They wait for us by the door and wiggle all over when we come home, like we're the best thing ever to happen in their day.
April 2016 - Dogs are a kind of wolf. They were the first animals that people fed on purpose, earlier than sheep or cows or chickens. People have been taking care of dogs in Central Asia since about 13,000 BC, in the Stone Age, before the beginning of farming(and possibly much earlier; maybe as long as 100,000 years ago, before people left Africa). Most likely, dogs themselves began this relationship by hanging around people's campsites (there weren't any villages yet), trying to snatch some of their garbage to eat. At first, people must have tried to scare the dogs away. But ... campsites with dogs were cleaner and healthier than campsites without dogs. Fewer people got dysentery and died.
The people who lived in these cleaner campsites grew up stronger than people who shooed away dogs, and there were more of them. Eventually, the dog-lovers pretty much took over... And dogs evolved to be able to digest more and more people-garbage, especially grains.
Somewhere around this time, people... began to see that the dogs could do other things too. Dogs would bark and let you know if any big animals or human enemies were coming. Dogs could let you know if the baby was getting into trouble. So people began to encourage the dogs to hang around. At some point, people also began to teach dogs to obey them. They useD the dogs to help them hunt other animals, and to pull sleds. Dogs were the earliest domestication of any animal, and may have given people the idea of domesticating sheep and goats... Nobody's sure whether this domestication of dogs happened only once, in one place, or many times, all over Europe and Asia, but all known dogs today are descended from those Central Asian dogs of about 13,000 BC. Even Native American dogs came to the Americas from Asia. Today's European dogs probably came to Europe with the Indo-Europeans from Central Asia, replacing earlier European dogs, just as Central Asian cats replaced earlier cats in China. (from an article by K.E.Carr)
I'm the first to admit that my dogs are one of the cores of my life. They love me unconditionally. I'm a member of the pack, alpha female. And I take that role seriously.
I provide their food (make it for them, in fact) and clean water (love my Berkey Water Filter. Although with their amazing gut I'm not sure I need to give filtered water to them. I've watched them drink from the ponds, a puddle on the drive and the chicken trough. Their favorite place to drink is out of the horse's water trough.), and a safe haven for them to run and hunt in. I set the rules and they accept me as a benevolent dictator.
Yup. My 'pack' hunts. Actually I think they may steal some of their munchables from the cats but neither of them will own up to it. Apple (my Golden in the picture above) did go through a short period where she hunted rabbits and brought them home for the kittens. It was an unexpected development that ended fairly quickly, much to my relief. Finding rabbits carefully piled up next to the front door was accepted and praised but hard to deal with since it involved the inevitable clean up. Good skill to have though. You never know when that kind of ability might come in handy, especially if there's a Zombie Apocalypse.
Our dogs are heroes, especially in the eyes of children. Even the wee tiny dogs are fierce wolves, at least in their mind's eye and ancestry. Today they're used as companions, helping people who are challenged by injuries to their hearts, minds, body or emotional state. There are innumerable videos of soldiers coming home to their dogs, babies sleeping with their best four legged friend on guard, and especially of people rescuing dogs from floods, fires or deplorable conditions they're living in. There are activists all over the world who help dogs to find their best partner in life.
The love between humans and dogs is mutual, part of the Yin and Yang of the world. They forgive us our human fallibility, offering one more time to roll over for a tummy rub and sleeping with their heads in our laps even after we've had a melt down over that pair of best shoes with the toes chewed out. ( Shoes are just so tasty! )
One of my dogs, Gypsy, saved my life twice. The first time was when some hopped up meth heads came in to my store at the end of the day, after I'd sent the help home and was just walking to the front to lock the doors. They came in, three of them, spreading out and flanking me. It was obvious they'd robbed before and knew what they were doing.
Gypsy, who probably sold as much product as I did by greeting people at the door and taking them to the newest exhibits with great enthusiasm (her droopy, guilty eye look sold more than one painting!), leaped right over the counter and hit them like a whirling dervish. She bit one of them in the arm, leaving a wound the police were able to identify him by later when he went to the emergency room to get stitches. And chased another out of the front door before turning on the last one and cornering him with a crazed look on her face and bloody froth (from the bite on the first guy) on her mouth. He laid down his knife and peed his pants he was so frightened. She got a special award from the police for her bravery (a lovely, big bone and a star shaped badge she wore on her collar).
The second time was when we had an intruder in our home. I came in after shopping and there she was in the dining room with the 'burgler' cornered in the dining room, shaking and sweating. " Geez lady. Call your dog off! " Obviously I didn't 'call my dog off'. Instead I called 911 and stood there, praising her, until the police arrived. She had a reputation with the local police department by then. Gypsy loved her second bone as much as the first.
Now we live with Miniver and Apple, two characters in their own rights. And both of them are mine because they chose me by sitting on my foot. All of my dogs do that, every single one. And I can remember all of them back to the beginning of my memories as a child. They were all my beloveds and I miss them too. They each taught me something important : Have confidence in yourself. Hold your head up and wag your tail and people will love you for being kind. Never miss an opportunity to chase a tennis ball. Frisbees rock! Tummy and shoulder rubs always make you feel better. Love is best shown with an enthusiastic kiss. Splash in every mud puddle you find. Live and love like every day is the only day. The list goes on and on. Respect your horse and they will respect you too. Barking at moths flying around the lamp at night is lots more fun than watching television. You never know what you'll find in a trash can so tip one over if you have a chance to. Cats drool, dogs rule (although the cats usually reverse that statement. It's an ongoing debate around here.)
But you're probably wondering where I'm going with this story today. No special place. My dogs are happy to be where I am, although rides in the car with their heads hanging out are way cool, especially when passing other cars with dogs who are also hanging out windows, drool flying by. I just wanted to acknowledge the canines who've brought so much joy in to our lives.
Here's to the laughter they bring in to us, the gentle tussles over a favorite toy. Here's to the nights they've sat up with me while I worry about whatever the latest catastrophy was and the days they've been there with me when I was lonely for my sons, now grown and launched in to exciting lives of their own. Here's to the treasures they've shared, always giving me the best bits, and the laughter that comes with some thing they've dragged in with them. There was the time Joe 'ate' the sofa stuffed with feathers while I was gone. I came back to this amazing cloud of feathers and tatters of feather pillows with an excited puppy running in great loopy circles with excitement. When I opened the door he burst out with one last pillow, shaking it for all it was worth, and 'The Great Feather Storm' following him, making the little girl next door laugh until she fell down. (She'd lost her Mom just two weeks before to Cancer. Her Dad told me later it was her first real laugh since her Mom had died.).
Here's to comfort they've brought me and the gift of how to accept a life well lived and the time to leave with grace and bravery. And here's to the unadulterated love they've taught me to practice. Be kind. Share without expecting anything back, well maybe a scratch behind the ears would be nice but sharing was just for sharing and the pleasure it brings, so an ear scratch can wait. And here's to the fine art of laughter when I needed it the most and remembering that it's just stuff so don't sweat it because it's not worth your time when there's other things to chew up and bury (like the time I was working with Lucky in the arena and came around the corner to find a half buried stuffed bear sticking up out of the sand. That taught me to laugh through a buck!).
And here's to sitting in the grass under shade of the oak tree in the front yard, reading a best book ever with a four legged friend curled up next to me, making me feel like a million bucks.
And here's to cat litter on the end of their noses, sticky half chewed bones 'buried' under the good pillows just set out for guests because they don't smell like dogs and chewed up bones, and that time Newman and Gypsy ran threw the house trailing toilet paper they'd unwound behind them, right through a reception dinner (and who, I have always wondered, opened the door to let them out of the bedroom?!).
And here's to the endless stories they've given me to tell at the Thanksgiving table. This story is for Penny, Shotsi, Hans, Fritz, Ernst, Leipkin and Maepkin, Alexander, Kippy, Rosy, Lightfoot, Gypsy, Newman, Joe, Mona, Tiberius, Miniver, and Apple. I hope I have a chance to add more names to that list before my time to leave comes. I'm not finished learning from them or telling the stories either. I love you guys!
I am, ever yours, Nancy, smiling and rummaging around, trying to find a good bone for them to chew (and laughing because there are two kittens asleep on top of the ever patient Miniver, as I write this)
We've talked about how to take yourself on a journey to eating a better diet by eliminating sugar and processed foods. And we've looked at how to find and grow your own vegetables and fruit. (Berries. I forgot berries. Raspberries, black berries and strawberries are easier to grow than you thought. Give your raspberry plant some room, at least a space that is five feet by five feet. Same goes for your blackberry plant. First year will not give you a noticeable yield. By year three you will be eating raspberries and blackberries like a King! You'll have so many shoots you'll be able to share them with friends. And strawberries? There are dozens of varieties available. You can grow them anywhere there is soil and sunshine, or plant them in pots. There are places you can pick your own too. Easy peasy!) This is where the fun stuff begins. Recipes! And easy to make recipes to boot. We'll start with breakfast. Ready? Set... GO! EGGS: Soft (3 to 5 minutes on boil) boil and serve with 1 tsp real butter, salt and pepper to taste. Serve with a sliced avocado and red grapes on the side. Or hard boil the egg. Make two eggs. Excellent source of protein. Want to make it easier? Use the same teaspoon of butter and fry your egg. Or scramble your egg. Delicious combination of flavors and textures. You can add beans, any kind, with tomatoes as a side for a truly hardy meal, English style. Try this first on a weekend when you're learning timing and experimenting with cooking. After that you'll find yourself fixing a meal like this on week days even when you're zooming around, trying to get things done so you can get your day started.
OATMEAL : You can use any kind of oatmeal (except for those wretched oatmeal in a pack things, with added fake flavors...total yuck!) but I like the whole rolled oats. A good rule of thumb is 1 cup liquid to 1/2 cup oats for rolled oats. It's 1 cup liquid to 1/4 cup steel cut oats. That's for one serving. Bring to a boil and reduce heat, simmer until creamy, takes about five minutes. Want to dress it up? Throw in a handful of cranberries or raisons, a handful of walnuts or pecans or a couple of teaspoons of whole ground flax seeds at the beginning, maybe a pinch of ginger or cinnamon and use 1/2 cup milk or soy milk and 1/2 cup filtered water. Serve with honey or 100% maple syrup and milk or soy milk (or any other milk substitute such as almond or rice milk). YOGURT : I love yogurt, eat it everyday. Sometimes I have it for breakfast, sometimes lunch or a snack. My favorite store bought brand is NANCY'S YOGURT (No, not my brand. Wish it were! I do like the name. Has a certain ring to it that appeals. Big smile here!). It's organic and has a delicious texture to it. All natural and organic, no additives of any kind. I would stay away from yogurts with added flavors and gelatin. Put your own toppings on it. Drizzle some honey or 100% maple syrup on it, add berries, sliced pears or apples, raisons, cranberries, bananas, pecans, walnuts, cashews, peanuts. You get the drift. I use whatever I Have available in the kitchen. It's never dull. Add a pinch of ginger, cinnamon, cloves, vanilla, cocoa nibs, a sprinkle of cocoa powder. Sprinkle on top ground flax seed meal or whey protein powder for an extra boost. Want a smoothie? Get out your blender and toss in any of the above, adding juice (the real stuff, no fake sugary gunk) of any flavor. Experiment. There are more combinations than I can write here and it's all raw, full of probiotics and fiber and delicious! Now, let's move on to lunch. Here we go... Oh, I should stop here and tell you that I really do believe in the old adage ; Eat like a King at breakfast, a Prince at lunch and a Pauper at dinner. (Or make that Queen and Princess, as you will) I love a quinoa salad with vegetables and fruit added to it. It only takes fifteen minutes to cook quinoa. Use 1 part quinoa to 2 parts liquid. You can do this the night before if you're taking your lunch to work with you. Mix it with any combination of vegetables (like cucumbers, diced onions, tomatoes, zucchini or yellow squash, peppers any colors you like, sweet or hot (your preference) and add in diced cheese such as feta, grated parmesan, raw cheddar, again whatever you love or have as leftovers in the fridge. Mix it all together with some kind of vinegar, olive oil, lime or lemon juice and herbs with a bit of salt and pepper. Or make a dressing with yogurt, lemon or lime juice, herbs and salt and pepper. This is another one of those easy does it ideas with endless variations on a theme. I like to mix fruit, vegetables and cheese to keep it interesting. Want something light, satisfying and easy? How about slicing an apple in to eight, twelve or sixteen pieces and putting peanut butter on it. Add some slices of cheese (cheddar is the classic with this lunch), some Botija Olives, a glass of kombucha. Voila! Fast, raw, cheap, filling, satisfying. Or yogurt in any of it's many combinations. It's good for both breakfast or lunch. And there's a real craft to making it too. You can buy cultures from all over the world on the net. Once you get one going you can make it for yourself overnight. Not to shabby!
Dinner is all kinds of fun. I love to focus on color when I make dinner, which means a lot of different vegetables, fruits, pastas (whole grain organic only), whole brown rice, quinoa, tofu, tempeh, soups, stew, frittata. My all time favorite dinner, especially in the spring, summer and fall is salad. A good salad comes in endless combinations of greens, vegetables, fruits, cheeses, eggs, meat if you like meat, dressings. It all depends on the day and what's growing in season. Here's my Friday Night Movie Night Special. CHEATER'S PIZZA : Things you'll need... Pizza pan or stone, an oven turned up to 425 degrees F, a chopping block for grating cheese and vegetables, imagination. If your oven cooks a bit cool, turn the temperature up to 450 degrees F. Shorten the cooking time. Start with whole grain tortillas. You can buy them as whole wheat or whole grain . And there are always organic choices now even in ordinary grocery stores. I like the smaller tortillas for individual pizzas and the larger for extra hungry teenagers. Put a white dressing or tomato sauce on the tortilla, keeping it thin. They get soggy if you put too much on. I love to use Annie's Organic Goddess Dressing. Sprinkle on top of that oregano, minced garlic or garlic powder, freshly ground pepper. Next layer is going to be spinach leaves, always fresh. Add minced onions. On top of that a thin layer of mozzarella. Layer on top of that thinly sliced mushrooms, green and or red sweet peppers either sliced or chopped and another thin layer of mozzarella. (We shred the cheese but you can slice it really thin too). Last layer is zucchini, yellow squash, red pepper, whatever colorful veggies (even thinly sliced radishes!), a last bit of mozzarella and Botija Olives, chopped on top. Variations on a theme : use different cheeses. Be careful if you use soft cheese. It melts and burns. Might add it the last few minutes. Cook for 12 minutes and check. It will probably take more like 16 minutes. You'll want the cheese bubbling and edges beginning to brown. Cut it on a wood board in to fourths, serve with parmesan and romano cheeses, shredded. Adults can have a good red wine with this, a side salad if you're especially hungry. Kids can have sparkling mineral water mixed with organic apple cider or Lemon Ginger Echinacea by Knudson. Pop your favorite movie in to watch, sit back and enjoy!
There are endless variations on a theme with this kind of wicked bad, ever so good for you (and they won't even realize it!) dinner. Have homemade popcorn for desert. Homemade cocoa with the popcorn tops off the meal. You are going to have so much fun learning how to cook and eat like this! If you want to, put out the ingredients and let your friends and kids decide what they want to put on their pizza. It's fast, easy, cheap, fun and just "junky" enough to satisfy. I am, ever yours, Nancy, smiling and anticipating Friday Night at the Movies!
How I love to garden. I've been a Master Gardener for more than twenty years and, before that, just your good old fashioned, everyday Mom in the yard gardener. The title Master Gardener came in to my life because I had an opportunity to take a series of classes from K State University . How could I pass that up? Shall I tell you what I learned from the University programs? The actual geography and biology, entomology and environmental science classes were wonderful. They filled some of the gaps in my education (and I am a life long 'Learn-a-holic' . I never pass up a chance to deepen my knowledge base.) And they reinforced what I had discovered along the way about how we all are interconnected. But the classes on how to use chemistry to garden? To farm? No, nope, nada, never. I have never used chemicals on the land, or in my house for that matter. There's no need to. I learned how to garden from my Grandfather. His family as well as my Grandmother's family had been farmers for generations. His philosophy was to use what was available. Do it yourself. The earth is healthy on it's own if you know how to compost and rotate the crops and animals correctly. His love of the Earth, the dirt we live in and on, was profound. It's had a lasting impact on my life. I work everyday to carry it forward for my children, their children and their children's children.
But what does that have to do with letting sugar and processed foods go from your diet? Everything. It's a cycle that interconnects. If you have an opportunity to plant seeds and grow your own food, no matter how small the space, DO IT! In fact I like the smaller gardens, especially if you're in a part of your life where you're going to school, working, raising your family . If you don't have the space, MAKE ONE. I've planted something in every place that we've lived even when I was a student living in a one room walk up with a grocery budget of $17 dollars a week. Putting my hands in to soil, whether it's in a pot or the ground, raised beds or even planting directly in to a bale of moldy hay, is always a satisfying process for me. FACT :
According to a survey by Gardeners' World magazine, 80 percent of gardeners reported being "happy" and satisfied with their lives, compared to 67 percent of non-gardeners.7 Perhaps it's no coincidence that gardeners are happier…
Mycobacterium vaccae is a type of bacteria commonly found in soil, which people may ingest or inhale when they garden.8 Remarkably, this microbe has been found to "mirror the effect on neurons that drugs like Prozac provide."9 It helps to stimulate serotonin production, helping to make you feel happier and more relaxed. No wonder so many people describe their garden as their "happy place."
In one animal study, mice that ingested Mycobacterium vaccae had a demonstrated reduction in anxiety and improved learning. The researchers noted that natural exposure to microbes may be important for emotional health and behavior: 10
"Recent studies show that contact with tolerogenic microbes is important for the proper functioning of immunoregulatory circuits affecting behavior, emotionality and health…
Collectively, our results suggest a beneficial effect of naturally delivered, live M. vaccae on anxiety-related behaviors… supporting a positive role for ambient microbes in the immunomodulation of animal behavior."
You're still wondering what this has to do with letting processed sugar and foods go. If you are filling some of your time outside with your hands in that lovely soil you've been building for years, you aren't inside obsessing about potato chips and soda pop. You're focused on learning how to companion plant, using herbs and flowers to protect your vegetables and fruit. You're exercising outside, bending and stretching, in the sunshine and fresh air, watching the tiny hummingbirds that have discovered your mint garden, showing them to your children or grandchildren. And you're discovering the immense satisfaction that comes from eating your first radish that you grew, sliced up in thin slivers and decorating the top of the salad that is made with heirloom lettuces and spinach. Is there any better way to change your eating habits than growing some of your own food? Want to teach your children how to eat vegetables? Start a garden with them; teach them how to mulch, pull weeds and tell funny stories while you're doing it, water the plants and playing in the hose at the same time. Ask them to cut some of the lettuce they grew, pull some of the radishes they watched and nurtured, and harvest some of the sugar snap peas off of vines they started. The sugar snap peas we grew, while our sons were growing up, rarely made it in to the table to eat. They were too busy eating them right out of the garden. And I watched from the kitchen window while they did it too and never said a word about it. It was exactly what I wanted them to discover!
All of the images I'm using in today's post are from our raised bed garden. We live on a preserve so vegetable gardening is better in an inclosed area. The wildlife around here loved me for the first four years we were here. We had some of the fattest, happiest deer, raccoon, opossum, rabbits and, well, the entire ecology out here thought we were the best thing to come along since sliced bread. I used everything I had learned over the years but, for the most part, they outsmarted me. I loved that! The goal for me has always been happy coexistence rather than battle. I learned from the scary smart four legged creatures who were here before me. And the process is on going too. I laugh every day at the ways they continue to out think me. So far, the best way for us to get a reasonable crop has been in 4 foot by 8 foot raised beds with a five foot chicken wire fence around it. And this year we're adding in a low voltage electric line top and bottom , not enough to hurt but definitely enough to get their attention. And I have no doubt they will, eventually, learn how to outdo us on that one too. It's a challenge that I love and it always makes me laugh even if that rascally rabbit did eat some of my heirloom lettuce. If you can not find a way to garden, there may be organic produce farms located fairly close in to you who would love to have you come out and volunteer in exchange for produce. Or, perhaps, there is a CSA program at a local grocery or Co Op you could join. In the big cities there are always weekend Farmer's Market's. Take your bags and boxes and shop there. You'll be directly supporting local organic farmers as well as meeting friends in an outdoor space full of beautiful produce stands. Better yet, go buy a flower pot and water proof tray or saucer, set it in your window and grow a tiny herb garden. I promise, it won't take long for you to be addicted.
If you're here, reading this, then you know how to use the search engines and browsers on Google, Youtube, Facebook and so on. There's a multitude of information available, right there on the little screen in front of you. It's the magic of twenty first century technology, the best part of it. Instead of reading the horrible news about who blew up what or terrified who, seek out some of those unlimited professional as well as amateur videos done by folks who are out there learning how to put their hands in to the earth and grow a garden. Do yourself a favor and get dirty! TIPS : Plant marigolds, mint and borage around the outside of your garden. The marigolds bloom all the way to frost and borage reseeds itself all season long, attracting hummingbirds, butterflies and bees. The mint will spread over the seasons and create a lovely hedge that you can use to make tea. Simply mow around the outside of your allowed mint area and pull out what you don't want from the inside, sharing the baby plants with friends. And there are so many kinds of mint you can use too. Smaller wildlife do not care for the smell of mint and the marigolds and borage will help to deter the insects you don't want in the garden. I also plant zinnias and black eyed susans. They bloom and reseed themselves for most of the season and you can pick them for bouquets. To build your soil find a local horse ranch and offer to take some of their composted horse manure. Around here we call it the 'gifts of the gods'. It's black gold in it's finest form. Mix it in to your garden space in the Autumn and it's ready to go in the Spring. Want to start a new garden space without tilling? Mow the grass down as close as you can and lay out flattened cardboard boxes on top. Put hay or straw on top of that. Next layer could be composted horse, chicken and cow manure, then soil, more compost, grass clippings, compost (WHAT? You're not composting the scraps from your kitchen? Not hard to do even in a tiny apartment. Get a plastic tub, any size, put your scraps in it and add some red earth worms you buy from the internet. They will compost it for you.), newspapers (all newspaper companies now use soy based inks, safe for gardens), more soil and so on. It's called lasagna gardening. Build it up the first year, let it sit over the winter (the freezing and thawing will help to break it up) and plant your first garden in it the next spring. Use leaves raked up to add an acidic base, balance that with your compost and soil. There are endless combinations and none of them are wrong. The best part of a raised bed, even without the sides, is that it drains well. Your soil will be loose and loomy and should end up being chock full of lovely, friendly earth worms.
Your garden is a wonderful classroom for your children. They'll meet all kinds of bugs, birds, snails, turtles, and other citizens they never had any idea were inhabiting the world with them. You can make up funny stories with them, draw pictures and send them to grandparents and friends. And you will have the opportunity to instill in to them a life long love for the earth. Heavens knows we could all use more of that.
This is the face and figure of a life long gardener! John is my husband and best friend forever (before there was a label created for that). He was, initially, dragged in to gardening with me. He's beautiful, isn't he? When you put your hands in to the earth your day to day problems melt away. You're focused on your next harvest, pulling weeds, and just looking at the beautiful space you created. Want to learn the fine art of Zen? GARDEN! Nothing brings you closer to the earth than paying attention to the soil, planting seeds and nurturing them, harvesting the fruits of your 'labor' and enjoying them directly from your garden. Get together with your neighborhood and school and create gardens. Did you know that crime rates dropped significantly in the inner city areas where neighborhood gardening was introduced? When you get the 'tough kids' involved, they will protect, nurture and harvest real food. It improves their connection to their neighborhood, builds confidence, improves overall health and helps them to discover their inner selves where, before, they were fighting and destroying each other.
So my suggestion for week eight is to find a place in your yard, your neighborhood, on a roof top garden or on a window sill and begin a journey in to the world of discovering where good food comes from. I promise you, there is nothing sweeter than fresh mint crisp lettuce (an heirloom variety) mixed with baby spinach and purple rosa lettuce tossed with good first pressed virgin organic olive oil, raw, unfiltered apple cider vinegar and pink himalayan sea salt and black pepper. Mind boggling delicious and so easy to grow. Look at that rich, black soil! I promise that you will become hooked on the pursuit of growing your own food, understanding soil, and seed catalogs. Let's not forget the seed catalogs! With the advent of the internet you can find excellent seed sources from anywhere in the world. I hope you'll stop by as the season goes along. I'll post more images for you so you can see the variety we have here.
So many plants to grow and all the time in the world to learn! It just gets better and better, people. I am, ever yours, Nancy, smiling with greens between my teeth and dirt under my fingernails. Go! What are you waiting for? The earth is calling. Now that the sugar is out of your system you can hear it...GO OUTSIDE!
